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The Secret to Building Real Attraction

Nov 18, 2024

I’ve got some real talk for you today, and it’s a game-changer. Most of you have been taught the wrong way to handle dating. Here’s the truth: you need to let women pursue you. This flips the script on everything you think you know about relationships, but trust me—it works.

Here’s why: women naturally want to chase a man they see as valuable. When they’re the ones working to get your attention, it feeds their instincts and creates deep emotional desire. But most men mess this up. They flip the dynamic, chasing women too much, which makes them lose interest fast.

Stop Chasing—Start Leading

Here’s the deal: when you’re constantly texting her, planning every date, or always trying to “prove” yourself, you look desperate. Women don’t respect or desire men who seem too available or too eager. Instead, focus on living your life and let her come to you.

Yes, in the beginning, you’ll need to take the lead. Set up the date, plan a fun activity, and make her feel comfortable. But after that, it’s her turn to step up. If she’s not putting in effort after the first few dates, she’s not truly interested—or doesn’t see you as high value.

The Power of Patience

A big mistake guys make is rushing things. Here’s a secret: women take longer to develop feelings than men do. While you might know if you’re into her after the first date, her attraction builds over time. That’s why patience is key. Give her the space to miss you. Let a few days pass after a great date before reaching out.

Why? Because when she’s wondering what you’re up to, she’s thinking about you. And when she’s thinking about you, she’s investing emotionally. That’s when her attraction starts to grow.

Be the Prize

Here’s a golden rule to live by: women want to feel like they won you over. If you’re giving her all your time, attention, and validation upfront, you rob her of that feeling. She wants to see you as the prize—someone she had to earn.

Think about this: when a woman knows she can have a guy at any time, he loses his mystery. But when you’re living your life, focused on your goals, and not always available, you become intriguing. You’re no longer just another guy in her inbox—you’re the one she’s thinking about late at night.

Action Steps

  1. Lead in the beginning. Take charge on the first few dates. Be confident, fun, and focused.
  2. Step back. After those first few dates, let her show you she’s interested. Don’t chase or over-communicate.
  3. Be patient. Give her time to think about you. Avoid being “too available.”
  4. Stay focused on yourself. Your purpose and passions come first. Women are drawn to men who are driven and independent.

When you start embodying these principles, you’ll notice a shift. Women will respect you more, be more attracted to you, and actually work to win your attention.

Remember, you attract what you are. Work on your internal value, and you’ll attract the right kind of woman into your life.

You are not a victim. You are a Headman.

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